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Emotional Intelligence



Emotional Karma
By: Jean Harper

My next door neighbor began a complete remodeling project on the outside of her home. I have to say that before the remodeling began, the house was quite unappealing to the eye. Now, it is beginning to look marvelous!  While all of this has been going on next door, in my home there has been some remodeling going on as well.  It wasn't my house that was in need of repair or remodeling- it was me.

My friends would describe me as a highly successful and motivated person. It seems from as far back as I can remember I have always been able to do whatever I set my mind to accomplish. I was Class President in high school as well as Homecoming Queen and I went on to become a very successful business woman after college. My professional life was scoring high but my personal life was much more of a challenge. I was way too sensitive and it seemed that I was wearing a ton of "buttons" that were available and just waiting to be "pushed".  I had a tendency to get involved with someone too quickly and when one relationship ended, I didn't give myself enough time before I got involved with someone else.  I was not happy just being alone and, I now know that, I lived in fear of that consequence. As a result of this fear, I often stayed in a relationship that wasn't right for me. I must admit that I really didn't know what was right for me because I did not allow myself the time to find out.

Fast forward...through a lot of counseling and spiritual work, my personal life has really improved. I spend a lot of time going within and I have gotten to know "me".  At least I thought that was the case.  I have learned so much about myself over the last several years and my journey has been truly amazing.  It seemed I was learning so much, so fast and them bam- I found myself alone again. This time it was different because I had come so far.  And this time I was determined to understand what I was feeling.

I spent a lot of time in personal inquiry-  Why did this happen?  What did I do wrong? What could I have done differently?  For a very short time I thought I had some good answers;  I had gained weight, there was the stress, I wasn't attentive enough, I wasn't listening or rather hearing, and the "I", this and that, seemed to go on and on.  After a few days of the "I" bashing, I felt pretty crappy about myself.  Then I opened a drawer, in my kitchen one day, and I came in full view of a photograph. The photograph was of me at about the age of 9 years. 

After all of the reading, meditations and the work I had been doing- that little 9 year old girl was back again but this time I was to finally figure out why.  Those buttons that I mentioned earlier- well those buttons were put there as "warnings"- warnings to let me know when to either run, hide or defend. If someone pushed one of those buttons I was transformed back to the 9 year old.  It wasn't that I was reverting back to a 9 year old in my outward behavior, I was reverting to that 9 year old emotionally.  It wasn't the event that was making me turn back, it was the "feelings", the emotions.  At last I understood!  It wasn't the person, the event, the breakup, the disappointment- it was the reminiscent feelings from being alone, as a child, that made me want to cry and find something, outside myself, to make me feel safe again.  I knew all of this mentally but I did not get it "emotionally".

Experts say that emotional intelligence (EQ) may be even more important than IQ in one's ability to achieve success and happiness. I may score well on tests and excel academically and professionally but how well do I handle disappointment, anger, jealousy and fear, the problems of communication, and all the ups and downs of relationships? Now, at last, I was really on to something!

Experts also state that persons with high EQ - who have developed emotional literacy - will have more confidence and trust in themselves, and more understanding of others. So they will make better relationships and experience more achievement, love and joy in their life. They will be emotionally mature, a state that many adults never achieve. Do you know someone with low EQ? I bet you can name a few.

I have known for a very long time that a meaningful and successful life requires being attuned to what is on the inside, beneath the mental analyzes, the appearances and control, and beneath the rhetoric. But now I know that it also requires being attuned to all aspects of the heart, the center of our emotions and outward reach to our world.  I have done many things in my life that have required me to be courageous and the heart is also the place of courage and spirit, integrity and commitment - the source of energy and deep feelings that call us to create, learn, cooperate, lead and serve. However when I experienced painful feelings, I now believe that my heart was telling me that I had unmet needs. I was interpreting reality through some kind of distorting filter. When I experienced positive feelings, my heart was pointing me in the right direction, towards fulfillment and truth. My Higher Self, the all-knowing part, connected to all consciousness, was communicating to my body-mind through this channel - not through verbal messages but through my heart. I just needed to be open to receive this intuitive wisdom.

Last Sunday, at the prodding of a friend, I attended a Yoga, call and receive, chanting session.  After this session was over I felt very strange and I could not put my finger on why.  As the hours passed I felt even more feelings coming up. I felt driven to explore what was going on for me and I started researching the different types of chants and tried to find some answers for what I was feeling. 

During the session I also visualized colors- indigo and violet. The colors seemed to be in motion and vivid. I knew that violet was the color associated with the crown chakra and is related to self knowledge and spiritual awareness.  It is also associated with the union with the Higher Self and higher consciousness- self guidance, wisdom, inner strength and with purifying our thoughts and feelings. Just where I needed to be, thanks Lori!

The chanting session began with a form of Bhakti Yoga chanting and from what I was discovering, Bhakti Yoga is used in connecting ourselves with the divine energy. Bhakti Yoga is also the method to release one from Karma. Oh no, what next? Then I delved into reading and learning about Karma.

 

 

The video below provides a good example or lesson for beginning chanting techniques. In our session it was much more intense and included more Sanskrit phrasing, mantras and prayer.

Karmic energy, from what I was reading, is the energy that is the result of previous actions and events both in this life and past lives.  If that energy was of a low vibration, it could be holding me back from what I desired to manifest. Cleansing your Karma, I read, can therefore help one realize life goals because you cleanse and release any energy road blocks that you can be experiencing. Is Karma bad?  From what I learned, the answer is no.  Is it good?  No,  It is simply energy from previous actions. As a child, I am sure I thought that the reason I was so alone was because I was being punished for doing something bad. In my religious upbringing, it was hard not to do something bad and you sure knew the consequences of being bad. It could really be scary to a young child.

I have my own personal theory of why I believe that cleansing my karma may be the last step for me to release that "emotional" block that has plagued me. The chain of events that led me to this are impossible for me to deny.  How can you change old patterns and release karma?

From Spring Wolf's - The Pagans Path, Metaphysics 101- it reads; "Through the process of Acknowledgment, Acceptance and Action, you can work toward releasing old patterns. You can't release something until you know it exists or are willing to admit it exists. So you first have to acknowledge the situation. Once you've faced the fact it does exist, you have to accept it. That's part of unconditional love. To accept the characteristic or action without judgment, without regret, without guilt, just accept it with love. Now the Action to correct or repay the debt can be put into motion".

I found many Karma cleansing suggestions or rituals but I resonated with these from Intuitive, Spiritual Counselor, and Metaphysical Teacher,  Sherry Binkelman, in her article, The Universal Law of Karma- Affirmations  for Releasing Karma.

"I release the past."
"I forgive myself for all past misdeeds and open myself to receive only love and light."
"I call on the law of forgiveness. I am free from mistakes and the consequences of  mistakes. I am under grace and not under karmic law."
"I am open to receive the Abundance of the Universe."
"I release all that is unserving in my life and choose to live out of love not fear."
"I release all negativity, fear, anger and doubt. I am a clear and open channel for love, light and knowledge."
"I embrace my Divine Perfection."

The real key to releasing Good Karma and Bad Karma is to neutralize the binding emotions to the current events in your life.  For me, I'm sending out all good vibrations.  For my little 9 year old, Jeanie, I say, "you've always got me, you will never be alone again".

Note:  I attended the Yoga Chanting session led by Ally Ford at White Orchid Yoga Studio in Clearwater, FL. If you are interested in attending one of these yoga chanting sessions you may contact Ally Ford from her website at:  Analayoga.com or for more information contact Lori Bushey  labegr@aol.com or on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/Yoga2tao

Additional Resources:  The Soul of Healing Meditations by Deepak Chopra and Adam Plack.

About This Album

Deepak Chopra teams with Australian new age musician Adam Plack on The Soul of Healing Meditations: A Simple Approach to Getting Younger, which features eight guided meditations set to gentle, world music-inspired instrumentals. The appropriately airy synth washes of "Breathing Meditation" lead into the rhythmic, tabla-driven "Heart Meditation" and soothing atmospheres of "Body Awareness." Chopra alternates quieter breathing meditations with more mentally challenging, biorhythmic exercises for a completely relaxing and refreshing experience. "Envoking the Gods of Healing" and "Inviting the Spirit of Healing" feature particularly lovely, Indian-influenced instrumentals with hypnotic tablas and flutes; the album becomes increasingly world music-based until it culminates with "Ode of Solomon," which provides a sensual, reflective finale. With its extensive liner notes, which outline Chopra's philosophies about the gods and goddesses of healing, The Soul of Healing Meditation is a good way for meditation novices to explore this relaxing art. ~ Heather Phares, All Music Guide- Click Here to Sample or purchase from Pandora Radio.

 

About the Author

Jean Harper is the founder of Moxy Women. The website and organization was founded in honor of her sister, Ann Elizabeth Harper who was an inspiration to Jean from early childhood and left her with an important mission- to help women everywhere to find, keep and share their Moxy! 

You may contact Jean directly if you would like to share your message of inspiration with other women.  Send her an email to:  info@moxywomen.com

 

 

 



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